Joaquim Monteiro

A Tribute to a Very Special Centenarian
(By Marci Pereira)

Joaquim Monteiro

It is often inferred that with advancing age comes growing wisdom and a greater appreciation of life’s lessons.   Based on this assumption one can expect that someone joining the membership of that exclusive club of Centenarians will be teeming with wisdom, good counsel, enlightenment and interesting stories of peoples and events in bygone years.  This is certainly true of someone I affectionately know as Uncle Joaquim Monteiro, a self made man, who I have grown to increasingly love, admire and respect over the years.   Here is my tribute to Uncle in honour of his 100th Birthday celebrations, recalling what I know and remember of this wise, loving, humble, genteel man.

Anyone, who has been privileged to know Uncle intimately, cannot but admire his great faith, personal strength and resilience in the face of profound adversity which has undoubtedly sustained him in remarkable good health and mental sharpness.   Amongst family and friends alike, there is keen curiosity to want to know more about the influences that have shaped his extraordinary life.

Portuguese Goa ~ Upbringing and Early Adulthood

Uncle was born in Cortalim, Goa, on 19 May 1908, during the Portuguese colonial era.  One of four brothers and two sisters, Uncle has mixed memories of his early upbringing in Goa.   That was a time when the Church was influential in terms of values, education and family upbringing.  Prospects for educational, vocational and occupational development were sparse and depended on issues like affordability and status in society.   Although brought up lovingly in a close knit family, times were hard for his parents.  Uncle’s early burning ambition was to go to music school.  Unfortunately, that did not materialise as his family could not afford it.  However, his musical talents did not go unnoticed.   Over the years, he was often the choice violinist and lead singer in community gatherings on religious/feast days known as Ladainhs/Fests as well as special occasions.    

As a young man, Uncle’s another ambition was to go to Africa where newly established colonies of the British Empire sought peoples of assorted professions, occupations and skills, mainly from the Indian subcontinent.   Vibrant stories from these new territories captured the imagination and desire of great number of young Goan men of his generation, including many of our grandfathers and fathers, all eager to explore new work opportunities in Africa.  With his yearning to sample life across the Arabian Sea and Indian Ocean, Uncle trained and became an expert Ladies’ Tailor.   In 1932, at the tender age of 24, Uncle arrived in Mombasa, Kenya, having been sponsored by his older brother Manuel to join in his expanding tailoring business.   Thus began a challenging new life for the young Joaquim Monteiro.

Kenya ~ An Enduring Impact on Life and Family

It was on 29 April 1945, towards the end of the Second World War, during the time of military movements, economic austerity, rationing and the like, that Uncle married the enchanting fair maiden Miss Marie Faria (Aunty) in Cortalim, Goa, and the two set up home in Mombasa, in the multifaith, multicultural neighbourhood endearingly known to us raised there, as the ‘Colony of Makadara’.  

Uncle went on to open his own tailoring business in Salim Road, Mombasa, in 1949 with Aunty ably helping with the stitching in addition to keeping the home.    During their 63 years of marriage, they have been blessed with 5 loving children, all born in Kenya (first named as follows with their spouses):  Celine/Laz, late Hilary (Leo)/Liseth, late Maggie/Jess, Theresa/Leo and Francis/Theresa.    Uncle reflects fondly on their happy times in Kenya.  However, raising a family of five was not easy where education, health and social welfare had to be paid for. But with sheer hard work, determination and many sacrifices he and Aunty nurtured, encouraged and supported the children towards educational/professional self enhancement.  An accomplishment they can both be proud of. 

Arrival in the UK  ~ Another Challenging New Life

Both Uncle and Aunty have had to confront some formidable challenges, one of which was to uproot and abandon their home and adopted lifestyle in Kenya (after 43 years for Uncle), owing to the uncertainties of the post-independence period which saw all the children migrate to the UK and Canada.   They arrived in the UK in February 1975 and lived with Hilary/Liseth in Luton for a short time before joining Maggie at their present address in Manor Park, London.    Many of us from the tropics, who have undertaken similar resettlement paths ourselves, know fully well of how challenging adapting to a new life in Britain has been.   Not to mention having to contend with the cold and bleakness of what seems like interminable winters.    In their characteristic determined way, Uncle and Aunty integrated admirably, engaging fully with neighbours and the local community from the beginning.   They earned their income working from home by undertaking contract stitching assignments for the renowned John Lewis Store in Oxford Street and others.   To continue to live independently in their own home, even to this advanced stage in their lives, is a remarkable testimony of their adaptation. 

Years of Anguish 
 
Without doubt, the hardest spell in Uncle’s 100 years will have been the period between 2000 and 2004, when the family had to painfully endure, first the untimely sad passing of Maggie and then Hilary in June 2004, both in their relative prime.   The loss of one dearly loved one is hard enough for any parent to bear, but to experience the demise of two loving children is soul shattering.   Understandably, in the face of pain, suffering, tragedies, bereavement and the like, one often hears about the bitterness and anger it generates and the deep questioning of the very existence of God such experiences evoke in loved ones.  Since these lamentable events, I have spent many close moments with Uncle.    Never have I ever heard him question or utter any such sentiments or ask ~ Why me or us?

I for one, have been so movingly touched and richly inspired by Uncle’s prayerful and sage-like philosophical reaction to his misfortunes, hearing him express his feelings such as:     “My child, Who am I to question His actions?......  Because of the Him I am still here. ….. I have been blessed with a loving wife and five affectionate children. …… The Almighty taketh just as He giveth. ….. Yes, I am deeply saddened they are not all with us now, but see I have the enduring legacy of wonderful grandchildren to remember them by.”       

In my experience, such compassionate understanding and wisdom emanates from holy people.   I can attest, Uncle is a Very Special Person.   No matter what, his counsel always is:  “Trust in the Lord.”  

Profound Faith & Spirituality

Without doubt, Uncle derives his deep inner strength from his Faith and Spirituality.  Ever since I can remember from my days in Kenya, he was one who unfailing attended daily Mass at the Holy Spirit Church in Mombasa, before commencing work.   This fervour continued here in the UK until his age-related frailty restricted his mobility in getting to and from church.   However, to this day he yearns and awaits with awe-filled anticipation to receiving Holy Communion in the home in humbling reverence, thankfully brought to him by obliging Eucharistic Ministers.

Uncle also has a special attachment to the Blessed Virgin Mary and recites the Rosary daily in thanksgiving for his blessings and to implore help.  His beads are always close at hand.   Amongst the many holy people Uncle is well read and informed about, are the 3 ‘pillars’ of Goa:  St Francis Xavier, the Patron of Goa, the more recently canonised St Joseph Vaz and the Venerable Fr Agnelo of Pilar.    Uncle proudly describes St Joseph Vaz, as his “compatriot”, for they both hail from the same village in Goa ~ Cortalim. 

Memorable Accomplishments

Included amongst Uncle’s many notable accomplishments are the following:

a)  The co-founding of the St Francis Xavier’s Goan Tailors Society in Mombasa, where he also served a spell as the Club Secretary in1958/59.

b)  Founding Member of the St Francis Xavier’s Union in London, after his arrival in the UK.

c)  Sailing on 4 cruises in recent years, with the most memorable taking in a visit to the Vatican.  The last cruise in April 2005, from Southampton to the Baltic states, carries cherished memories for different reasons.  Uncle and Aunty celebrated their 60th Wedding Anniversary on board the Golden Princess, where the Captain ordered champagne and a special cake to celebrate the occasion and warmly toasted the couple in the company of fellow passengers and crew.   Being the oldest couple on board, it prompted the Captain to probe into the secrets of their long married life.

d) Anyone who has visited Uncle and Aunty in their home in London, cannot fail to be captivated by the most impressive framed jigsaw puzzle of Westminster Abbey that adorns their living room.  This fully assembled 1500-piece mural includes such intricate detail and contrasting shades of dark and light that it soon becomes apparent what a painstaking and time consuming task this imposing exhibit must have presented.  Uncle accomplished this labour of love over several months, working in short spells and total secrecy, with even Aunty unaware of what was hidden under their bed all that time.  This ‘masterpiece’ has been much coveted by a former parish priest amongst many others.  Rightfully, it is to remain as a prized heirloom in the family.

Attributes to Uncle’s Longevity

In keeping with the Captain of the Golden Princess, many members of the family, friends and acquaintances are curious to know what Uncle’s secrets for a healthy long life are.  This perhaps can best be summarised in the three virtues: Love, Faith and Hope.  Uncle is the first to admit that Aunty has been, and is, a hard working and trusting life’s companion by his side.  It is this loving, caring partnership above all, he believes, is the key attribute to his longevity.   He is so dependent on her that he is not the same man whenever Aunty is unwell.

A recent research article by the American Time magazine concluded: ‘Married people live longer and are healthier throughout those extra years.  Also, marriage helps both spouses cope better with stress, though men benefit more than women’.  Without doubt, Uncle would have endorsed this if he was consulted.  

This loving relationship, together with the love and affection of his children and grandchildren has been a sustaining force in his life.   He takes great pride in the development and achievements of his 6 grandchildren:  Mark, Malcolm, Dominic, Cassandra, Leo and Trixiebelle.

Uncle’s fervent faith in the Lord has blessed him with that deep inner strength which has helped to withstand trials and tribulations that lesser mortals would have succumbed.   He firmly believes that one’s hopes can best be realised if faith in the Almighty remains central in our lives.    He has lived by these precepts all his life.

On a light hearted note, are the health enhancing multivitamins, cod liver oil, aloe vera juice, glucosamine and the like of any help?  Well may be.   A small tot of brandy with the last meal of the day has been Uncle’s ‘tonic’ over the years.  In addition, his emphatic counsel to all is: “Don’t Smoke and Keep Away from Drugs”. 

Toasting a Remarkable Man and Life
 
I am very blessed to have known Uncle closely and to have been enriched and inspired by his interesting and colourful life.   Apart from being a rich source of useful historical stories about Goa, Kenya and mutual friends/relatives in bygone years, he remains for me one of our last family elders who I can communicate in our native Konkani.   I am truly astounded by his mental alertness and vivid memory on a whole range of subjects and am impressed by his quest for current news, be it national or world affairs.   Uncle carries a wealth of information sufficient for any family member(s) to compile an absorbing life history including invaluable research into the Monteiro family ancestry.

Long may Uncle continue as that Shining Example of Love, Humility, Spiritual Devotion and Wisdom.  Also, long may he live to enjoy our love and dutiful respect.  Joining with all the family and well wishers, I hereby toast a Remarkable Man on this Auspicious Birthday with the prayer:    

‘Thank You Dear Lord for the Gift of Joaquim Monteiro ~ A Rich Blessing in Our Lives.’

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CELEBRATING A CENTURY OF LIVING

Immediate family members, a group of relatives and lots of friends gathered in a small church hall in Ilford, to celebrate the 100th Birthday of Joaquim Monteiro.  Many had travelled from far and wide to be present at this very momentous occasion and to toast the continued health of this wonderful centenarian. 

The occasion began with a Mass offered by Rev Fr Oliver Antao and was followed by a party with music provided by Chico.  A surprise guest at the celebration was Bishop Alex Dias from the Andaman and Nicobar Islands, who was in London for a few days, en route to Europe. 

The toast was raised by Marci Pereira (ex Mombasa), who reflected on the life of Mr Monteiro and highlighted some of the milestones of this long journey. 

To mark this rare event, Flavio Gracias, President of the Goan Association (UK) (who was one of the guests) presented Mr Monteiro with a lead crystal fruit bowl, which was suitably engraved.  The gathering gave considerable pleasure to Flavio Gracias as it was a reunion with four of his classmates from the Sacred Heart High School in Mombasa - Lazarus Pereira, Marci Pereira, Nelson Monteiro and Leo Saldanha.

Photographs of the occasion appear below.

 

The birthday cake

           

Mr Monteiro cutting his cake

    

Fr Oliver wishing Mr Monteiro

    

Mr Monteiro making his speech